Say Sey Sey
by amythis
Summary: A sequel to the third-season episode "The Proposal" and sort of to my story "Geournal," with Tony and Angela agreeing to be each other's Valentines after she breaks up with Geoffrey.
1. What You Want

ABC STANDARDS & PRACTICES ANNOUNCER: The following program contains non-explicit resolved sexual tension. As such, viewer discretion is advi—

TONY: (voiceover) Ay-oh, oh-ay! Resolved?! You mean me and Angela?

ABCS&PA: Who else?

TONY: But this is what happened last week….(Flashback clips to "The Proposal.")…How did we get from that to, um, resolution in one episode?

ANGELA: (seductively in voiceover) Well, it happened something like this….

Scene I: Angela's bedroom

TONY: You think you made the right decision?

ANGELA: Tony, Tony, you don't think about these things, you feel them. (Tony corrects her Italian hand gesture, his hand holding below her wrist) Oh. (Then they look down at his hand and he lets go.)

TONY: I, uh, I guess I should put the ladder away.

ANGELA: Yes, before the neighbors think we're eloping.

TONY: (indignantly) I would never elope!

ANGELA: I thought you were Mr. Emotion and Spontaneity.

TONY: That doesn't mean I wouldn't want a big church wedding. Uh, if I was gonna get married again.

ANGELA: Right. I don't know what kind of wedding I'd want. If I were to get married again.

TONY: Sorry you lost the chance to find out.

ANGELA: (smiling) I'm not.

TONY: (smiling back) Me, too.

ANGELA: I am a little sorry I'm alone on Valentine's Day.

TONY: Oh, yeah, I forgot what day it is. With everything going on.

ANGELA: So I guess you don't have a Valentine either this year.

TONY: Angela, would you—? Hold on, let me do this right. (He gets down on one knee.) Angela, would you do me the great honor of being my Valentine?

ANGELA: Sey.

TONY: Why are you saying "say"?"

ANGELA: No, it's like "on" for "no."

TONY: So S-E-Y?

ANGELA: Sey.

TONY: (getting to his feet) Great! I mean, it'll be nice because we'll have someone to, to talk to. Since the kids are gone till tomorrow.

ANGELA: Both of them?

TONY: Yeah, after you went upstairs with laryngitis, Jonathan asked if he could spend today and tonight at his friend Steven's.

ANGELA: Steven's?

TONY: Yeah, he'll be back around noon. He wants to show off the ant farm Geoff got him for Christmas. I would've checked with you, but I didn't think you wanted to talk about Geoff just then.

ANGELA: OK. And Samantha?

TONY: She's at Bonnie's slumber-party/romance-movie-marathon. Coed, but the boys have to leave by midnight. And heavily chaperoned, I checked.

ANGELA: Of course you did.

TONY: So, uh, it's probably too late to make dinner reservations.

ANGELA: Yes, all the nice restaurants will be booked for tonight.

TONY: Right, but I can make you a nice home-cooked dinner. What would you like?

ANGELA: A kiss.

TONY: Excuse me?

ANGELA: A kiss.

TONY: You don't mean the chocolate kind, do you?

ANGELA: No, although it's just as sweet, from what I remember.

TONY: From what you remember? You mean from swapping spit when we were 13—

ANGELA: You were 11.

TONY: Right. Or do you mean that time you got drunk and kissed me in the kitchen?

ANGELA: You kissed me.

TONY: No way. I remember that night a lot better than you do, and you started it.

ANGELA: Well, maybe, but you continued it.

TONY: I think we need to reconstruct that night.

ANGELA: You want us to get drunk again?

TONY: We can skip that part. Besides, do you remember what I said about wanting you to remember it next time?

ANGELA: (blushing) Tony, are you saying you're ready to "lose me as a friend"?

TONY: I'm sayin' whatever happens, we need to think clearly.

ANGELA: (gulping) Right. (She kisses him on the mouth.)

TONY: Oh, I thought we were gonna do that in the kitchen.

ANGELA: I decided you were right, I kissed you first.

TONY: That time, yeah. (He kisses her on the mouth.) We can take turns.

ANGELA: And sometimes we can start it at the same time. (They grab each other and kiss passionately. Then they break apart, stunned.)

TONY: Well, I guess I don't have to carry you upstairs this time.

ANGELA: If we ever make it downstairs. I mean, not "make it," but, you know.

TONY: Yeah. Angela, I'm not thinking too clearly anymore.

ANGELA: Me neither.

TONY: Wasn't there something I was supposed to take care of?

ANGELA: Dinner?

TONY: It's early afternoon. There's plenty of time. (They start kissing passionately again, and we see them move towards the bed. Fade to black and then commercial.)

Scene II: Angela's bedroom, eighteen hours later

(Tony and Angela are asleep. She's still wearing her long pale blue nightgown but he's now shirtless. She stretches her arm and it lands on his face. He gently lowers her arm and caresses it. They wake up a little and smile at each other.)

ANGELA: (sleepily) Good morning, Tony.

TONY: Morning, Angela. (Then he wakes up more.) What am I doing here?

ANGELA: I thought you were going to remember.

TONY: I remember, I remember! I just thought it was a dream.

ANGELA: Do you have these kinds of dreams often?

TONY: (hesitantly) Maybe once or twice.

ANGELA: (dreamily) Me, too.

TONY: Yeah?

ANGELA: Yeah.

TONY: Sorry about dinner.

ANGELA: We did get a little distracted, didn't we?

TONY: Yeah. Not that I'm complaining.

ANGELA: Me neither. In fact.

TONY: Yeah?

ANGELA: Well, remember me telling you last night about that little problem I had with Geoffrey?

TONY: Where you couldn't "get to Maine" but he finally got you to "Rhode Island"?

ANGELA: (blushing) Yes. Well, thank you for getting me to Rhode Island. And Maine. And the rest of New England.

TONY: Well, thank you for getting me to Texas.

ANGELA: (embarrassed and flattered at the same time) Tony!

TONY: Deep in the heart of Texas. (She giggles girlishly.)

ANGELA: Maybe next time we can try for something even bigger, like Alaska.

TONY: Yeah? Mutual Alaska?

ANGELA: That would be lovely.

TONY: OK, but first I'm heading south. (We hear her giggle again as the screen fades to black again.)

Scene III: The living room, two hours later

(Mona enters from the back door, carrying a large, full mailbag. She lugs it over to the coffee table and she sits on the couch. She opens the bag and starts sorting letters on the table. Angela, wearing her blue robe, looking exhausted, descends the staircase. She's startled to see Mona.)

ANGELA: (with a hoarse voice) Mother, what are you doing here?

MONA: Angela, what day is it?

ANGELA: (has to think a moment) Sunday?

MONA: And it's the day after Valentine's Day.

ANGELA: You're not going to tell me those are all the cards you got this year?

MONA: Don't be silly, Dear. There's another bag in my apartment.

ANGELA: Why did you bring them here?

MONA: I have to organize them. And your living room is much bigger.

ANGELA: Of course.

MONA: Or is it insensitive of me to do this when you've just broken up with Geoffrey?

ANGELA: How did you know I broke up with Geoffrey?

MONA: I saw a Porsche arrive yesterday, and I saw it drive away a few minutes later. For good?

ANGELA: Yes, for good.

MONA: (looking up) Hallelujah!

ANGELA: Mother.

MONA: I'm sorry, Dear. I know you're probably very upset.

ANGELA: No, I'm fine. It was the right decision.

MONA: Well, I just wondered, because Tony said yesterday that you got laryngitis worrying about it, and your voice is still hoarse.

ANGELA: Oh, right. My voice. Well, that's from screaming.

MONA: (intrigued) Really?

ANGELA: (gesturing at the television) Screaming at the TV.

MONA: The TV?

ANGELA: Yes. They, they were having a romance-movie marathon and I started yelling at the contrived, unrealistic, sexist scenarios.

MONA: Scenarios plural? Why did you keep watching if it upset you so much?

ANGELA: Well, it was sort of cathartic.

MONA: I see. (She starts sorting her cards again. Tony, still shirtless but wearing his pajama bottoms, descends the stairs. Angela tries to signal to him to go back upstairs but Mona looks up in time to catch him.) Good morning, Tony.

TONY: (hoarsely) Hey, Mone.

MONA: (to Angela) Was he screaming, too?

TONY: (both confused and trying to act innocent) Screaming?

ANGELA: Yes, Tony. Screaming at the stupid romance movies last night.

TONY: Oh, right. Real dumb.

MONA: So you two spent Valentine's Day in front of the idiot box?

T & A: (together) Yes.

MONA: How pathetic! Well, Angela at least has an excuse.

ANGELA: Mother!

MONA: Your break-up, Dear. But, you? Tony the stud? You couldn't do better than that?

TONY: For your information, Mona, I had a wonderful evening. Um, watching TV.

MONA: (shaking her head) Well, I guess it couldn't have been worse than last year when you two had a blind date and you maxed out Angela's credit card.

ANGELA: (quietly) Yes, this was an improvement. (She and Tony try not to meet each other's eyes.)

MONA: And just think, you didn't even need Jonathan to fix you up this time. (Jonathan enters the front door, carrying an overnight bag and an ant farm.)

JONATHAN: (setting down his things) Hi, Mom. Hi, Tony. Wow, Grandma that's a lot of Valentines!

MONA: (shrugging) This is just A through L.

ANGELA: Jonathan Sweetie, you're home early.

JONATHAN: Some of my ants escaped, so Steven's mom sent me home.

ANGELA: Oh, that's too bad. I mean about the ants.

JONATHAN: (shrugging) I'll ask whatshisname, I mean Geoffrey, to buy me some more.

TONY: Uh, Pal, I don't think that's a good idea.

JONATHAN: OK, I'll wait for my birthday.

ANGELA: (going to him and taking his hand) Sweetheart, Geoffrey isn't going to be here for your birthday.

JONATHAN: (sighing) OK, I guess it can wait till next Christmas but I don't like having a broken colony.

ANGELA: No, Jonathan, Geoffrey isn't going to be here again.

JONATHAN: Ever?

ANGELA: Not ever.

JONATHAN: (looking up) Hallelujah! (Angela glares at Mona, who puts on a "who me?" expression.)

TONY: Jonathan, your mom did what's right for her.

JONATHAN: Tony, can I ask you something?

TONY: I was yelling at the TV.

JONATHAN: Huh?

TONY: My sore throat, I yelled at the TV.

JONATHAN: Not that.

TONY: Oh, well, you see sometimes grown-ups do things that are hard to explain.

JONATHAN: Like leaving the ladder leaning against Mom's window?

T & A: (together) WHAT?

MONA: I was going to ask about that.

TONY: (to himself) I knew I forgot something.

JONATHAN: What was it doing there?

TONY: I, I was cleaning windows of course.

JONATHAN: Then why is there the word "no" on Mom's window?

TONY: Vandals!

JONATHAN: Vandals?

TONY: Yeah, these teens came by, sprayed a word on your mom's window, and then ran off when I yelled at them.

JONATHAN: I thought you yelled at the TV.

TONY: That was later. First I yelled at the teenagers.

MONA: The teenagers who climbed up to Angela's window?

TONY: Yeah, they, they—

ANGELA: They used our ladder.

MONA: The nerve of them!

JONATHAN: Why did they write "no"?

TONY: Well, they, you see—

ANGELA: They were from North Haven.

TONY: Yeah, I saw their jackets.

MONA: Maybe you can identify them to the police.

TONY: Well, Angela and I agreed not to press charges.

ANGELA: Yes, you know, high-spirited youth.

MONA: But this is vandalism! I can't believe you're taking this so lightly.

JONATHAN: But why did they just write N-O?

TONY: I interrupted them. And then I got interrupted when I was trying to clean it off. I'll go finish that now. (He grabs a jacket and goes out the front door.)

JONATHAN: Mom, can I ask you something?

ANGELA: Is it about Geoffrey?

JONATHAN: Sort of.

ANGELA: Sweetheart, why don't you take your things upstairs and we'll have a little talk when you come back downstairs?

JONATHAN: OK. (He grabs his bag and farm, then heads upstairs.)

MONA: Dear, before you have that little mother-son talk, I'd like to have a mother-daughter talk.

ANGELA: Now?

MONA: Yes, now.

ANGELA: (sighing) Let's go in the kitchen

Scene IV: The kitchen, a few minutes later

(Mona watches in amazement and amusement as Angela raids the refrigerator.)

MONA: Feeling a little peckish, Dear?

ANGELA: (blushing as she takes ice cream out of the freezer) I haven't had breakfast yet.

MONA: What about dinner last night?

ANGELA: (quietly) No.

MONA: Lunch? (Angela has to think about it. Then she blushes more.)

ANGELA: No.

MONA: What, not even popcorn during the marathon?

ANGELA: Not exactly. (She stuffs her face with cookies, not only because she's starved but because she doesn't want to have this conversation.)

MONA: And Tony? Did he have anything?

ANGELA: (with her mouth full) Is there any of that apple pie left?

MONA: Angela, I'm your mother, talk to me. (Angela sighs and swallows.)

ANGELA: About Geoffrey?

MONA: Sort of. What brought you to your senses?

ANGELA: (quietly) Tony.

MONA: (smiling) So he gave you his opinion?

ANGELA: Yes.

MONA: And how exactly did he convince you?

ANGELA: He just made me see that love isn't something you think about.

MONA: Huh?

ANGELA: It's something you feel.

MONA: I see. And were you thinking while his ladder was against your window?

ANGELA: Mother!

MONA: So to speak.

ANGELA: OK, Mother, I'm only going to say this once and I'm not going into detail and if you tell anyone, I'll kill you.

MONA: Go on.

ANGELA: Do you remember the night I couldn't remember and I thought something happened with Tony?

MONA: Vividly.

ANGELA: Well, I remember last night. Vividly.

MONA: Hallelujah!

ANGELA: Mother, stop that. You're a bad influence on Jonathan.

MONA: And apparently a bad influence on you.

ANGELA: Mother, this isn't like that. Tony is very special to me and it wasn't just about fun.

MONA: Oh, God forbid you have fun.

ANGELA: I didn't say it wasn't fun.

MONA: Oo, do tell!

ANGELA: Mother, don't you have some Valentine's cards to sort? At your apartment?

MONA: (sighing wearily) I guess I just have to be happy that it finally happened.

ANGELA: Are you happy, Mother?

MONA: (sincerely) Very. This is what I've always wanted for you both. (They hug. Tony enters and smiles at this touching moment. Then Mona breaks away from Angela.) So I'm going to the pharmacy later. Do want me to pick you two up some— (They glare at her.) Cough syrup?

TONY: No, thank you, Mona. I've got an old family remedy.

MONA: (suggestively) I'm sure you do.

TONY: Hey, getoutahere!

MONA: All right, but, unlike Geoffrey, I shall return.

TONY: Thank you, General MacArthur. (Mona salutes and then exits through the door to outside.)

ANGELA: Well, so much for the mother-daughter talk. Now for the mother-son talk.

TONY: You can hold off on that. I checked in on Jonathan and he's out like a light. I think he, Steven, and the ants were up late. (Angela yawns. Tony smiles.) Yeah, they weren't the only ones.

ANGELA: Maybe we should go back to bed.

TONY: (whispering as if they might be overheard) With Jonathan down the hallway?

ANGELA: I mean separately.

TONY: Oh, right. Yeah. Like how we had to bathe separately.

ANGELA: Well, Tony, I was afraid if we were in the bathtub together, we'd never make it downstairs.

TONY: (smiling as if remembering something) Yeah.

ANGELA: What?

TONY: I was just thinking of the first time I saw you naked.

ANGELA: You said you had a lousy memory!

TONY: What was I supposed to say? I caught my boss, my new boss, coming out of the tub.

ANGELA: I was so embarrassed!

TONY: Believe me, you had and have nothing to be embarrassed about.

ANGELA: (blushing for a different reason now) Really?

TONY: Yeah. And you're even better than I remember. (They kiss. Then there's a pounding at the door to outside.)

ANGRY WOMAN: Open up, you shameless hussy! (Tony and Angela stare at each other. Freeze frame.)

TO BE CONTINUED


	2. But Don't Play Games With My Affection

Scene V: The kitchen

ANGRY WOMAN: (offstage) I said open that door, you shameless hussy! (Tony and Angela stare at each other.)

ANGELA: (to Tony) Did you forget a Valentine's date?

TONY: I had only one Valentine's date, and you know I kept it.

ANGRY WOMAN: (less angrily) Angela? I know you're home. Let me in!

ANGELA: (in surprise) That's Diane Wilmington!

TONY: Angela, I swear, there's nothing going on with me and her.

ANGELA: Not for lack of her trying.

DIANE: (sounding a little forlorn) Angela, please? I can hear you talking.

ANGELA: (sighing) I guess I should let her in.

TONY: Do you want me to stay?

ANGELA: First let's see why she's calling me a shameless hussy. (Opening the door to outside) Diane! What a pleasant surprise. (We see Mrs. Wilmington, played by Marilu Henner, wearing a low-cut dress. In a concession to the February weather, she's also wearing a wool hat and matching scarf.)

DIANE: (pointing at Tony) Aha!

TONY: (holding his hands at shoulder level, palms up, baffled) What?

DIANE: Look at how you're dressed!

TONY: (looking down at his pajama bottoms) I always sleep like this.

DIANE: But you're not sleeping, are you? Except for sleeping with her! (She points at Angela.)

ANGELA: (calmly) Diane, what business is it of yours how or where Tony and I go to bed?

DIANE: See? You said "you and Tony" going to bed.

TONY: Angela's right, it's none of your business.

DIANE: I happen to be your neighbor and this is a decent neighborhood!

TONY: (to Angela) It's too bad Mona's missing this. (Angela nods.) Mrs. Wilmington, what does me being in pajamas have to do with you calling Angela a "shameless hussy"?

DIANE: Everyone knows she's practically engaged to Geoffrey with a G. And yet, you climbed a ladder into her room yesterday afternoon and didn't take the ladder down till twenty hours later!

TONY: You were timing me?

DIANE: Yes, and it was very impressive. But that's not the point!

ANGELA: What is the point, Diane?

DIANE: The point is, you lied to me when you said nothing was going on with you two.

ANGELA: (sincerely) I wasn't lying.

DIANE: (uncertainly) You weren't?

ANGELA: No.

DIANE: Then I was jumping to conclusions?

ANGELA: Diane, I can assure you that Tony didn't spend the last twenty hours in my bedroom.

DIANE: Oh, this is embarrassing.

TONY: It sure is.

DIANE: Gee, I'm sorry, you two! It's just Tony's so gorgeous, you'd have to be an idiot not to jump him.

ANGELA: Well, maybe I'm an idiot.

DIANE: Yeah, you must be. No offence.

ANGELA: None taken.

DIANE: So, Tony, does this mean you're available?

TONY: Gee, Diane, that's very flattering, but I've just started seeing someone.

DIANE: Oh? Is it serious?

TONY: It could be. It's too soon to say.

DIANE: Don't tell her what I thought!

ANGELA: Your secret's safe with us.

DIANE: Thanks. You guys are the best neighbors!

ANGELA: And you're one of our most interesting neighbors.

DIANE: Aw, shucks. Well, I'll let you get back to your— (She looks at all the food on the table, including ice cream.) Sunday brunch?

TONY: (giving a little wave) See you soon.

DIANE: (eyeing him) Let me know if things don't work out with you and the new girlfriend.

TONY: You'll be the first to know, Mrs. Wilmington. (Diane exits, Angela shutting the door behind her.)

ANGELA: (shaking her head) I think I liked her better as a brunette.

TONY: Well, not everyone's cut out to have dark hair. Sometimes a dye job is more flattering.

ANGELA: (with her arms crossed) Tony, what are you implying?  
>TONY: Come on, Angela, I've known for two and a half years that that ain't natural.<p>

ANGELA: (moving one arm down protectively) Two and a half years?  
>TONY: Yeah. (pointing at his own scalp) The black roots?<p>

ANGELA: (relaxing a little) Oh, right. I thought you meant— (She coughs.)

TONY: Angela, believe it or not, that time in the bathroom, I didn't check you out in the, well, let's call it the above-the-knee-and-below-the-waist area.

ANGELA: (not sure if she's relieved or insulted) You didn't?

TONY: It all happened so fast, and I was so surprised.

ANGELA: What exactly did you see? That is if you can recall with your "lousy memory."

TONY: (going to her) I saw your shoulders. (He opens her robe enough to kiss her nearest shoulder. She gasps in surprise and pleasure.) And your stomach. (He reaches into the robe and caresses her stomach. She mmms.) And your legs below the knee. OK, maybe a little of your lower thighs.

ANGELA: How much lower?

TONY: (raising the hem of her robe) Let's see, maybe about to here, or here. Or—

SAM: (calling offstage from the living room) Dad, I'm home! (Tony takes his hands off Angela and sighs in frustration.)

TONY: (whispering) Later?  
>ANGELA: (whispering back) As soon as possible.<p>

TONY: I hope so.

ANGELA: Should I go out there, too?  
>TONY: Actually, could you go out there first? I need a moment to, (he crosses his hands over his crotch) to clear my mind.<p>

ANGELA: (amused and flattered) All right. How about me? Do I look flushed or anything?

TONY: Nothing an innocent fourteen-year-old would pick up on.

ANGELA: Good. (She takes a deep breath and pushes open the swinging door.)

Scene VI: The living room

(Sam is setting down an overnight bag and sitting down in the chair to the stage right of the couch, as Angela enters from the kitchen.)

ANGELA: Hi, Sam, how was the slumber party?

SAM: Hey, Angela. Are you feeling OK?

ANGELA: Yes, I'm fine, why?

SAM: Well, you look a little flushed.

ANGELA: Oh.

SAM: Also tired. And your voice is hoarse.

ANGELA: Well, yes, I have laryngitis.

SAM: You should get Dad to make his old family remedy.

ANGELA: He's working on it right now. (yelling towards the kitchen) Tony, how's that remedy coming?  
>TONY: (yelling back) Almost done.<p>

SAM: He sounds hoarse, too. Is laryngitis contagious?

ANGELA: Sometimes.

SAM: You two shouldn't be yelling if you have sore throats.

ANGELA: We forgot.

SAM: It's too bad you're contagious. I wanted you to sit down and talk with me.

ANGELA: Oh, what about?

SAM: About whether it's a good idea to start dating someone when you've just broken up with someone else. (Angela looks stunned. Cut to commercial.)

Scene VII: The living room, a few moments later

ANGELA: Samantha, how did you know I broke up with Geoffrey?

SAM: (very surprised) You broke up with Mr. Wells?

ANGELA: Yes. Yesterday.

SAM: (delighted) Really? (trying to hide her delight) Wow, that's awful!

ANGELA: (trying not to smile) Yes, but I'll live.

SAM: How did it happen? I mean, you two seemed pretty serious. Didn't you go away on another romantic weekend? Hey, that's right. You came back early, didn't you? Did you break up then? Or did you come back because you were sick?

ANGELA: (unsure how much to say) It's a long story.

SAM: I'll bet!

ANGELA: So you weren't asking about me breaking up with someone?  
>SAM: No, I meant "you" in a general sense.<p>

ANGELA: Did one of your friends break up with her boyfriend?

SAM: Hello? Angela, have you forgotten my traumatic break-up with Chad McCann just ten days ago?

ANGELA: Oh, of course not, Sweetie. But you weren't exactly engaged to be engaged.

SAM: Well, no, but we were practically engaged to go steady.

ANGELA: I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be insensitive.

SAM: No, Angela, you're great. Like a muh—like a sister. Maybe we could have a woman-to-woman talk if you sit over there. (She points at the chair to the stage left of the couch.)

ANGELA: All right. (She settles into that chair.) So I guess you like a new boy?

SAM: Actually, it's Todd.

TONY: (entering from the kitchen, with a glass of something) What's Todd?

SAM: Dad, do you mind? We're having a private conversation here.

TONY: Oh, excuse me. I'm only your father.

SAM: Dad, nothing personal but it's personal.

TONY: You can say personal things to Angela that you can't say to me? (He's hurt but also glad that she's so close to Angela.)

SAM: It's woman stuff.

TONY: Oh, OK. I'll leave you two "women" alone, but first Angela has to drink this. (He holds out the glass.)

ANGELA: (taking the glass) What's in it?

TONY: (with a slight emphasis) Honey. And, uh, peppermint, and salt water.

ANGELA: (dubiously) Sounds delicious.

TONY: It's for your throat. I had some, and hear how much better I sound?

SAM: Actually, Dad, your voice still sounds a little tired.

TONY: Well, Angela and I did a lot of talking yesterday.

SAM: (trying to hide her hope) You did? Was this before or after she dumped—Got laryngitis?

ANGELA: I think it was during.

SAM: What did you talk about?  
>TONY: It was a private conversation.<p>

SAM: Really?

TONY: And if you ain't tellin' what you two are talkin' about, I'm not tellin' you what me and Angela talked about. (Sam looks tempted to tell him, just to find out, but she glances at Angela, who looks uncomfortable.)  
>SAM: Hey, I respect your privacy.<p>

TONY: That's my cue to leave, right?

ANGELA: (amused) I think so. (He sighs and goes back in the kitchen.)

SAM: So, Angela—

ANGELA: So, Sam, what happened with Todd?

SAM: Oh, it was right before the boys had to leave.

ANGELA: At midnight.

SAM: Yes, Angela, you can tell Dad that Bonnie's dad kicked the boys out on schedule.

ANGELA: Good. And there were chaperones?

SAM: Yeah, Bonnie's parents were both there the whole time.

ANGELA: Your father will be very relieved.

SAM: Great, but don't tell him this part. Todd asked me to go steady.

ANGELA: Oh! (Angela is unsure how to react. Should she squeal like she's one of Sam's girlfriends, or should she be a concerned mother figure?) That's wonderful! But a little sudden, isn't it?

SAM: Well, I've dated him off and on for awhile.

ANGELA: Yes, but he was just one of the boys you were dating. And it didn't seem as serious as with Chad.

SAM: Well, it was and it wasn't. Chad was, or I thought he was, emotionally devoted to me. I mean, he wrote a song about me!

ANGELA: And it was a very sweet song.

SAM: Yeah, but it was just words, empty words. With Todd, it's different. It's more, well, physical.

ANGELA: Oh?

SAM: Yeah, well, you know, that time he gave me a hickey. And the time he tried to feel me up. Not that I don't want to do things with him, but it was going too fast.

ANGELA: Sweetie, I don't think going steady is going to slow things down.

SAM: (sighing) I guess not. Also, he didn't like it when I was better than him at basketball.

ANGELA: I thought you worked things out.

SAM: We did. But we still fight.

ANGELA: Then I think you have your answer.

SAM: No, I don't. I like fighting with him!

ANGELA: You do?

SAM: Yeah. Chad and I never fought. Until the end, it was just nice and calm. With Todd, there's more of a spark. (shrugging) I don't know. Maybe it's being Italian, that I want that.

ANGELA: (smiling a little) I don't think you have to be Italian to enjoy a healthy argument.

SAM: Angela, do you—?

ANGELA: Yes, Sam?

SAM: Well, if it were you, would you wait awhile before dating someone else? So it's not like you're on the rebound?

ANGELA: I might. In your case, it's not like Todd is someone you've just met.

SAM: Yeah.

ANGELA: On the other hand, you need to take your time. Not rush into things.

SAM: (nodding) That makes sense. Angela, if I gave you a hug, do you think I'd catch laryngitis?

ANGELA: Probably not, but I can't guarantee it.

SAM: What the heck, I'll risk it. (They go to each other and hug.) Angela, can you do me a favor?  
>ANGELA: What's that?<p>

SAM: Can you leave the room? I need to call my friends and see what they think.

ANGELA: (letting go and smiling) Of course. I respect your privacy. (She goes to the swinging door.)

Scene VII: The kitchen again

(Tony has put away the junk food that Angela took out. He now backs away from the swinging door and goes over to the stove, pretending he's been making breakfast all this time, rather than eavesdropping. Angela enters and smiles, catching on to what he's doing.)

TONY: Oh, hi, Angela. Is your private talk over?

ANGELA: For now.

TONY: How did it go?  
>ANGELA: All right I think.<p>

TONY: Did you—? Never mind. I'll try to give her her space.

ANGELA: Remember, Tony, we may need to ask that of her.

TONY: (sighing) Yeah. Do you think we should tell the kids? I mean, not what we did, but just generally what's going on?

ANGELA: (sighing) I don't know. It's going to be tricky because Jonathan is so young and he worships you.

TONY: He does?  
>ANGELA: Of course he does. You're like a favorite uncle and a superhero rolled into one.<p>

TONY: Uncle Wonder-Tony?

ANGELA: (smiling) Something like that, yes. (She sighs again.) With Sam, I don't know.

TONY: Yeah, especially since she's at that romantic age.

ANGELA: Yes.

TONY: She sees romance everywhere. And she'd be really upset if this didn't work out.

ANGELA: You think it's not going to work out?

TONY: No! I mean, I, I don't know. It was great last night. And this morning. But that's easy.

ANGELA: What is?

TONY: (whispering) S-E-X.

ANGELA: (laughing) Tony, you don't have to spell it out to me.

TONY: You never know who might be listening.

ANGELA: Well, I don't think you spelling it out is going to confuse them.

TONY: Probably not. But what we did. (dropping his voice) Making love. That was easy. Not that you're easy. But you're easy to make love to. With.

ANGELA: So are you.

TONY: Yeah? Are you always—?

ANGELA: Am I always what?

TONY: Well, I used to suspect, hope, you were bottling up a lot of, well, let's call it energy, but you were really, I mean—you were amazing!

ANGELA: So were you.

TONY: Yeah, but that's no surprise.

ANGELA: Excuse me?  
>TONY: No offense, Angela, but I'm Italian. Warm, earthy, passionate. You're an upper-class Connecticut WASP. Who'd look at you and think <em>Madonna mi, this woman is a volcano!<em>

ANGELA: I'm not sure if you're complimenting me or insulting me.

TONY: (going over to her and hugging her) Baby, it is a huge compliment.

ANGELA: Well, thank you then.

TONY: So are you always like that?  
>ANGELA: No, it depends on my partner.<p>

TONY: How good he is?

ANGELA: Yes, but also how I feel about him.

TONY: Yeah? So how do you feel about your latest partner? (Angela hesitates and then there's an insistent knock on the door to outside.)

ANGELA: If that's Mother or Diane Wilmington, I will kill her.

TONY: Hey, maybe if we're lucky, it'll be both.

EAGER WOMAN: (offstage) Angela, are you still downstairs?

ANGELA: (moving away from Tony) It's Wendy Wittener.

TONY: You gonna kill her?  
>ANGELA: No, I like Wendy. Although she is really nosy.<p>

TONY: Only about whether you're getting it on with me.

ANGELA: Right. Maybe if we ignore her, she'll go away.

WENDY: Angela, I hear voices. I'll count to ten in case you and Tony aren't decent.

TONY: Jeez, do all the neighbors think we're doin' it in the kitchen?

WENDY: Onetwothreefourfivesix—

ANGELA: (opening the door to W. W.) Good morning, Wendy.

WENDY: (sounding like she's star-struck) Hi, Angela. Hi, Tony!

TONY: Hey, Mrs. Wit—Wendy.

WENDY: How are you both doing today?

ANGELA: I have a touch of laryngitis actually.

TONY: Angela, drink your honey-peppermint salt water.

ANGELA: Yes, Tony.  
>WENDY: (as Angela sips from the glass) Oh, you two are so cute!<p>

TONY: Um, thanks. (Angela has a coughing fit.)  
>ANGELA: (no longer hoarse) Tony, what else did you put in there?<p>

TONY: Horse radish. And Tabasco.

ANGELA: Are you insane?

TONY: Hey, it cured you, didn't it?

WENDY: Just adorable.

ANGELA: Wendy, this is kind of a bad time—

WENDY: Of course. Just one quick question.

ANGELA: What's that?

WENDY: (stage-whispering at Angela) So is it true about you and Tony?

ANGELA: I'm going to kill Diane.

WENDY: Well, I sort of heard it from Mona.

ANGELA: Correction. I'm going to kill my mother.

WENDY: Then it is true!

ANGELA: What did she say?

WENDY: Well, Diane said—

TONY: You said Mona told you.

WENDY: Excuse me, Tony. This is a private conversation.

TONY: Oh, sorry. I'll get back to cooking brek—brunch. (He does so.)

ANGELA: What did Diane and/or my mother tell you?  
>WENDY: Well, Diane said that if I hear any gossip about you two, it's not true. Because you swore to her that you weren't lying when you said there was nothing going on between you two, and Tony did not, appearances to the contrary, spend the previous twenty hours in your bedroom.<p>

ANGELA: Yes, I did say that.

WENDY: At first I thought that Diane had no reason to lie about that, especially since she'd be happy to spread the opposite gossip. But then it occurred to me, I hadn't heard any rumors like the ones she was denying. And it was funny she brought the subject up.

TONY: (muttering) Yeah, real funny.

WENDY: So, Angela, then it occurred to me, maybe at the time you said there was nothing going on, there wasn't. And maybe Tony didn't spend all those hours in your bedroom. Maybe he was in other rooms part of the time.

ANGELA: Wendy, what you have to understand is—

WENDY: So then I asked Mona, and she said you'd kill her if she said anything.

ANGELA: (putting her head in her hands) Oh God!

WENDY: So am I right? Did I put the clues together and solve the mystery?  
>TONY: Yeah, you're a regular Nancy Drew.<p>

WENDY: Tony, do you mind? We're still talking here.

TONY: Sorry. I'll go see if Sam wants brunch. (He starts to go towards the swinging door, but Sam enters, furious.)  
>SAM: (pointing at him) You! (pointing at Angela) And you! I thought we were sisters!<p>

ANGELA: Oh, Sweetie, we are.

SAM: A sister doesn't hop into bed with a sister's father!

WENDY: Huh?

SAM: (not noticing Wendy) And she doesn't lie about it! (Sam storms back out the swinging door. Tony and Angela look at each other, not knowing what to do. Wendy looks both uncomfortable and intrigued. Freeze frame.)

TO BE CONTINUED


	3. Take, Take, Take What You Need

Scene IX: The living room, a minute later

(Sam's pointer finger is furiously stabbing the buttons on the phone. Tony enters, looking both guilty and angry.)

SAM: Bonnie, you're not going to believe what happened!

TONY: (shifting completely over to anger) Samantha, hang up that phone! (Sam rolls her eyes but knows better than to disobey.)  
>SAM: Sorry, Bonnie. Gotta go. (She hangs up loudly.)<p>

TONY: Sam, what were you doing?  
>SAM: Calling a friend. Is that a crime?<p>

TONY: You know what I mean. You were about to share something very private, after all that about wanting me to respect your privacy.

SAM: OK, number one, I'm sure you eavesdropped on me and Angela. (Tony looks uncomfortable because it's true.) And number two, I heard it from Marci, so it's not exactly a secret.

TONY: Marci?!

SAM: And number three, after what you and Angela did, I have to talk to someone I can trust.

TONY: (trying to control his temper) Samantha, go to your room.

SAM: What?  
>TONY: I said go to your room!<p>

SAM: I'm not the one who did something wrong!

TONY: You go to your room and you stay there till it's time to go to school tomorrow.

SAM: There's no school tomorrow. It's President's Day.  
>TONY: Then stay there till Tuesday!<p>

SAM: (coldly) Fine. (She storms over to and up the stairs. Tony mutters in Italian. Angela comes in, eating a cookie.)  
>TONY: Angela, will you quit eating junk? I'm gonna make you breakfast when things calm down. (Angela swallows.)<p>

ANGELA: Well, that might not be till dinnertime.

TONY: (laughing bitterly) Yeah. Where's Wendy? Gone to spread more gossip?

ANGELA: Yes, about that. She did leave, right after telling me that she called Isabel before she came over.

TONY: Isabel? As in Isabel Schaeffer-Ferguson, Marci's stepmother?

ANGELA: Yes. Not that Isabel necessarily told Marci about us, but Marci might've overheard something.

TONY: Great, just great. Angela, can I say something sexist?  
>ANGELA: If you have to.<p>

TONY: This all happened because women like to gossip.

ANGELA: Tony.

TONY: I mean it, Angela. Look at who's to blame— (ticking them off on his fingers) Mona, Mrs. Wilmington, Wendy, Isabel, Marci, and who knows how many others!

ANGELA: Tony, that's just because women like to talk about feelings.

TONY: But these aren't their feelings, they're ours!

ANGELA: I'm sure that given the opportunity, your friends would be just as gossipy about us.

TONY: Yeah, but it wouldn't be about feelings.

ANGELA: Well, if you think about it, they're talking about not just our feelings but what they think we did physically.

TONY: So you're saying women are worse?  
>ANGELA: No, I just mean— (Jonathan comes downstairs.) Jonathan Sweetheart, I thought you were napping.<p>

JONATHAN: I was, but there was too much yelling.

ANGELA: I'm sorry, Sweetie. Um, did you want to talk now?

JONATHAN: Well, sort of. There's something I want to ask about.

ANGELA: What's that, Darling?

JONATHAN: You said whatshisname, I mean Geoffrey, was never going to be here again.  
>ANGELA: That's right.<p>

JONATHAN: So why did I see his Porsche out my window? (Angela is speechless.)

TONY: Holy sh—smoke!

ANGELA: Jonathan, you saw Geoffrey's Porsche?  
>JONATHAN: Yeah. Not the one that you let the tree fall on but the new one.<p>

ANGELA: (trying to be calm) How long ago was this?

JONATHAN: Right before I came downstairs. (Tony and Angela look at the front door, as if expecting Geoffrey to burst in. The moment passes.)

TONY: Maybe it was just a Porsche that looks like Geoff's.

JONATHAN: You want me to go look?

ANGELA: Yes, but unobtrusively.

JONATHAN: Un-what?  
>TONY: Lift the curtain a little but don't let him see you.<p>

JONATHAN: OK. (He does so.) It's him. He's sitting in his car, talking to himself.

TONY: That ain't good.

ANGELA: Maybe he's singing with the radio.

TONY: Parked in front of your house, the day after you dumped him?

JONATHAN: Oh, he's getting out of the car!

ANGELA: Jonathan, go to your room!

JONATHAN: What did I do?

ANGELA: Nothing. But you need your sleep. (Jonathan looks like he wants to say something but decides to obey, sensing this is something adult. After Jonathan disappears, Tony and Angela look at each other.)

TONY: Should I leave? Or do you want me to stay for support?

ANGELA: That's very sweet of you, Tony, but under the circumstances, well.

TONY: (nodding) I'll go back to making brunch. (They wait a moment.) He's sure taking his sweet time.

ANGELA: Well, it's not exactly an easy thing to confront me about.

TONY: You kiddin' me? If you dumped me and got together with your "platonic" best friend in less than 24 hours, I'd break down the door.

ANGELA: Tony, I would never do that.

TONY: Dump me or get with another guy?

ANGELA: I'd have to be crazy to do either. (They give each other The Look. Then a rap on the door.)

GEOFFREY: Angela, I need to talk to you.

TONY: (as he exits to the kitchen) Let me know if he's staying for brunch. (Angela nods. Then she takes a deep breath and goes to the front door. She opens it to her very recent ex.)

ANGELA: Hello, Geoffrey.

GEOFFREY: (curtly) Angela. It sounds like you got your voice back.

ANGELA: Yes, I took Toe—Yes, I feel better now.

GEOFFREY: Oh?

ANGELA: Geoffrey, please come in. It's cold out.

GEOFFREY: (closing the door behind him) Well, I hear it's been anything but cold in here. Rumor has it, it's been very warm. Some might even say steamy.

ANGELA: (unsure whether to act indignant, defensive, or apologetic) Well, Geoffrey, you see—

GEOFFREY: (holding up his hands to stop her) Angela, I understand. And it's not the first time I've heard gossip about you and Tony. I know how people can twist your innocent friendship into something it's not.

ANGELA: Um.

GEOFFREY: Not everyone understands you. Not everyone realizes that a beautiful, classy, sophisticated, intelligent, educated, successful woman like you would have nothing to do with a guy like Tony.

ANGELA: (crossing her arms) A guy like Tony?

GEOFFREY: Hey, don't get me wrong. I like Tony. But you would never get involved with someone like that.

ANGELA: I see. So what are you doing here?  
>GEOFFREY: Well, I think the gossip is worse than before.<p>

ANGELA: Oh?

GEOFFREY: Yes, I mean, if even Paul Ferguson is gossiping, that's not good.

ANGELA: Even Paul Ferguson?  
>GEOFFREY: Well, come on, he's a doctor. And a man. I mean, well, you know.<p>

ANGELA: Go on.

GEOFFREY: The point is, Angela, I don't know what exactly happened here after I left yesterday, to give people the wrong impression, but you really do need to think about how things look.

ANGELA: And what business is that of yours?  
>GEOFFREY: Angel, I love you. I understand that you don't want to marry me, but I still care about you. And I don't want to see you get hurt.<p>

ANGELA: (less frostily) That's very sweet of—

GEOFFREY: Also, how do you think that would make me look, you dumping me and then hopping into bed with your housekeeper?

ANGELA: Maybe I was on the rebound.

GEOFFREY: Well, even then—Was? As in not hypothetically?  
>ANGELA: (too angry to blush) As in, yes, the rumors are true.<p>

GEOFFREY: You slept with Tony?  
>ANGELA: Yes.<p>

GEOFFREY: Less than twenty-four hours after we broke up?

ANGELA: Less than twelve. And I was not on the rebound.

GEOFFREY: (getting angry, too) Yeah? Was that the first time?

ANGELA: Of course!

GEOFFREY: You expect me to believe that you just suddenly boffed your housekeeper?

TONY: (storming in from the kitchen) All right, Buddy, that's enough outa you! (Cut to commercial.)

Scene X: The living room, a moment later

ANGELA: Tony, please, I can handle this.

TONY: Please, Angela? Just one punch?

ANGELA: No, Tony. You know how I feel about violence.

TONY: Yeah, you're right. I might regret it later.

GEOFFREY: (to Tony) I'm not scared of you. (Tony gets in his face and gives him the stare that Angela taught Tony for his recent boxing match.)

TONY: Oh, yeah?

GEOFFREY: (backing away) OK, maybe a little scared.

ANGELA: Tony.

TONY: (frustrated) All right, all right!

GEOFFREY: (to Angela) So is this your type now, the macho tough guy?

ANGELA: That's only one side to Tony. He's also wonderfully sweet and sensitive.

GEOFFREY: Yeah, I'll bet.

TONY: Listen, Geoffrey with a G, at least I know how to make Angela happy.

GEOFFREY: What's that supposed to mean? You have a bigger endowment?

ANGELA: (shocked) Geoffrey!

GEOFFREY: I'm sorry, Angela. I was out of line. (Tony looks around like he can't believe this passes for crudity.) I'm just really upset!

ANGELA: I know, and I'm sorry you had to find out like this. I swear to you, I was completely faithful to you. But I think I've always had feelings for Tony, and I decided to stop denying them.

GEOFFREY: You still didn't have to go to bed with him before I drove out of the neighborhood.

ANGELA: It wasn't like that!

GEOFFREY: (to Tony) You jumped her, didn't you?

ANGELA: (quietly) Get out.

GEOFFREY: What?  
>ANGELA: I never want to see you again.<p>

GEOFFREY: Of course not. Now that you you've got wonderfully sensitive Tony.

TONY: The lady said you should go.

GEOFFREY: Fine. I don't know why I came over to reason with you. You're obviously not thinking with your brain. (Tony simmers with anger but Angela is frosty again.)  
>ANGELA: Out. Now.<p>

GEOFFREY: Angela, I'm sorry. I don't want to end our friendship like this.

ANGELA: We were never friends. You never really knew me.

GEOFFREY: Apparently not.

ANGELA: Tony is my real friend.

GEOFFREY: (opening the door) Yeah, your "friend."

ANGELA: One more thing, Geoffrey.

GEOFFREY: (turning to face her again) Yeah, what's that?  
>ANGELA: In every way that matters, Tony is much better endowed. (She slams the door in Geoffrey's stunned, wounded face.)<p>

TONY: (wincing in sympathy) Oo, ouch!

ANGELA: That was below the belt, wasn't it? (She smirks.) So to speak.  
>TONY: Yeah. But I think you guaranteed he'll never come back.<p>

ANGELA: Yes. And it would've been the perfect put-down, if Herb Wittener weren't removing snow from his driveway.

TONY: Oh, jeez, do you think he heard you?  
>ANGELA: Well, probably not over the snow blower.<p>

TONY: Yeah, and even if he heard you, he's a guy. Guys don't gossip.

ANGELA: Right.

TONY: Well, I guess everybody knows our business now. Or will by midnight.

ANGELA: Except for Jonathan.

TONY: (quietly) Yeah.

ANGELA: Tony, maybe we can deal with the gossip, not that it will be easy. But what about the kids?

TONY: Yeah. It was bad enough when I was running for PTA president last year, and the gossip wasn't true back then.

ANGELA: Yes. It would be different if we didn't live together.

TONY: And you weren't my boss.

ANGELA: (quietly) Yes.

TONY: Angela, maybe we made a mistake.  
>ANGELA: A mistake? You think we're a mistake?<p>

TONY: Oh, no, Baby, no! Come here! (She goes to him and he folds her in his arms.) Me and you are not a mistake. We are—

ANGELA: Yes, Tony?

TONY: The best thing to happen to me in a long, long time.  
>ANGELA: (crying a little) To me, too.<p>

TONY: Oh, Angie, don't cry!

ANGELA: Angie?

TONY: I'm sorry, I don't know where that came from.

ANGELA: (smiling through her tears) I like it.

TONY: You do?

ANGELA: (wiping her eyes) Yes, it makes me sound more Brooklyn.

TONY: Yeah, well, maybe a little Brooklyn has rubbed off on you after living with me.

ANGELA: (with raised eyebrows) And maybe a little Connecticut has rubbed off on you.

TONY: (letting go of her) Stop that!

ANGELA: What?

TONY: This is no time to be flirting!

ANGELA: Was I flirting? I didn't mean to.

TONY: No way. I know you, Angela. When you flirt, it's on purpose.

ANGELA: (mock-pouting) I thought you were going to call me Angie.

TONY: (exasperated) An-gel-a!

ANGELA: I'm sorry. I was just trying to lighten things up a little.

TONY: That's supposed to be my job.

ANGELA: (suggestively) You're very good at your job.

TONY: Angela.

ANGELA: Sorry. (She clears her throat and tries to slip back into her more reserved pre-Tony mode.) You were saying that we made me a mistake.

TONY: Come on, let's sit down. On separate pieces of furniture. (She gives him a mock-innocent look. He shakes his head and sits down in the closest chair. She sits on the end of the couch closest to him.) When I said "mistake," that wasn't the right word. I love—what we did. But maybe we should've waited.

ANGELA: We did wait, Tony. It's been almost two years since our drunken kiss in the kitchen. Since then, we've shared a bed where we both knew it, and you said—well, you said in the hospital, you told me, um.

TONY: That I'd want you to raise Sam if I died?

ANGELA: (realizing they're still not going to talk about his half-conscious "I love you") Right. How much longer were we supposed to wait to get together? Five years?

TONY: Don't be ridiculous. We'd never have lasted that long. (They laugh and it breaks the tension a little.) I think we should've got together, just not together. Not right away.

ANGELA: Oh. Well, that wasn't my intention when I asked you for a kiss in my bedroom. I just wanted a kiss.

TONY: (worried) Then you didn't want the rest?  
>ANGELA: No, I wanted it by the time we got to it. I just wasn't expecting it when we started.<p>

TONY: Me neither. But it felt too good to stop.

ANGELA: (like she's talking about having eaten more chocolate than she should've) I know! (They give each other The Look, then he forces himself to turn his head.)  
>TONY: Angela, can you move to the other end of the couch?<br>ANGELA: Oh, sorry. (She does so and he cautiously looks at her again, then looks away.)

TONY: (half to himself) I don't understand this!

ANGELA: Understand what?

TONY: Well, we did it. Twice. Plus all the other stuff.

ANGELA: (remembering) Mmmmm.

TONY: But now I want you more than ever!

ANGELA: Did you think you were going to get me out of your system?

TONY: No, Angie Bower, I had the feeling that you'd be the kind of girl who gets deep into a guy's system.

ANGELA: You certainly got deep into mine.  
>TONY: Angela.<p>

ANGELA: Sorry.  
>TONY: You're enjoying this way too much. (She giggles. He shakes his head, like he finds this cute despite himself. Then the phone rings. They both look at it.) You want me to get that?<p>

ANGELA: (losing her flirtatiousness) No, ignore it. They'll give up after awhile. (They wait, but the phone keeps ringing.)

JONATHAN: (from the upstairs landing) Isn't anyone going to answer the phone?

ANGELA: No, Sweetie, it's a wrong number.

JONATHAN: How do you know?  
>TONY: Believe me, anyone calling right now would be a wrong number.<p>

JONATHAN: (confused) Oh. (The phone stops ringing.)

ANGELA: Sweetie, why don't you try to get some more sleep?

JONATHAN: (yawning) OK. Wake me up when you have to time to talk to me. (Angela and Tony look at each other and nod.)

ANGELA: Now's a good time. Please come downstairs.

JONATHAN: Are you sure?  
>ANGELA: Yes, I'm sure.<p>

TONY: (to Angela, as Jonathan descends the staircase) Maybe I should talk go to Sam. Or is it your turn to talk to her?

ANGELA: Maybe we should do this all at once.

TONY: You sure?  
>ANGELA: I'm sure.<p>

TONY: Jonathan, could you go up and get Sam?

JONATHAN: But I thought I was gonna have a talk with Mom.  
>ANGELA: Sweetheart, it's more of a family talk.<p>

JONATHAN: (not questioning it) OK. (He goes back upstairs and out of view down the hallway.)

TONY: Family?

ANGELA: We are a family. That's what you said when I lost my job.

TONY: Yeah. We are. It's just we're a different kind of family now.

ANGELA: Yes. OK, Tony, maybe we should've taken it more slowly. I usually don't go that far on the first date. With Geoffrey, well, it took a couple of months.

TONY: Yeah, I know.

ANGELA: You know?  
>TONY: Well, yeah, I got the feeling at the Fairfield Inn that that was the night.<p>

ANGELA: You got a feeling? Did this feeling involve a glass to the wall? (Tony actually blushes. Then Jonathan appears at the landing again.)  
>JONATHAN: Sam says she can't leave her room till Tuesday morning.<p>

TONY: Tell her I'm partially lifting her grounding. (Jonathan sighs and disappears from view again.) So what were you gonna say about taking it slowly?  
>ANGELA: Well, I think with our feelings for each other, and our closeness in other ways, we wouldn't have been able to just date. Not living in the same house.<p>

TONY: And not with the first date in your bedroom and you in your nightgown.

ANGELA: (shaking her head) That wasn't even one of my sexy nighties.

TONY: All your nighties are sexy. When you wear them.

ANGELA: Thank you. And you haven't even seen this little black lace number I've got.

TONY: No, I've seen it. I've seen you in it.

ANGELA: When?

TONY: The night we got drunk and kissed.

ANGELA: The nightie I woke up in? Over my clothes?

TONY: Yeah. I looked in on you later and you were wearing that. You must've woken up a little and forgotten the getting undressed part.

ANGELA: You looked in on me? Why?  
>TONY: I was worried about you.<p>

ANGELA: That's so sweet!

TONY: (embarrassed) And I was kinda kickin' myself that I didn't let you pull me into bed.

ANGELA: I tried to pull you into bed?  
>TONY: Yeah, you were an animal.<p>

ANGELA: I'm so sorry!

TONY: It's okay. It was flattering. But I couldn't give in to you. Except, well, later I thought maybe if you had a chance to sleep it off some, and you still wanted to, we could.

ANGELA: (shocked) Tony!

TONY: Hey, I was drunk, too.

ANGELA: Still.

TONY: Well, my "monk" side kicked in, and you were asleep anyway.

ANGELA: So I guess we really did wait.

TONY: Yeah. (The Look, then he breaks it.) Angela, can you move further away?

ANGELA: Tony, if I keep moving, I'll end up in the kitchen.

TONY: No, the other side of the room is good enough. But I kinda wish you'd changed out of your robe.

ANGELA: (going to the opposite chair) Well, you're still in your pajamas.

TONY: I am well aware of that, Angie.

SAM: (offscreen) Jonathan, I told you, I don't want to talk to either of them.

JONATHAN: (offscreen) Sam, don't you want to know what's going on?  
>SAM: I already know more than I want to know.<p>

JONATHAN: What? What?

TONY: (slipping back into "dad" mode) Both of you, downstairs, now!

ANGELA: Well, this is it. The moment of truth. (Tony nods and sighs. He and Angela look at each other, wondering what's going to happen next. Freeze frame.)

TO BE CONTINUED


	4. But Don't Leave Me With No Direction

Scene XI: The living room, a minute later

(The four of them are sitting in awkward silence, the kids on the couch, Sam in the middle with her arms crossed, Jonathan on the end closest to his mother.)

ANGELA: (brightly) Well, shall we get started with our family talk? (Sam rolls her eyes.)

TONY: Did you have something to contribute, Samantha?

SAM: I just want to say that I'm not talking.

TONY: OK then.

SAM: But if I were, I would say things that I can't say in front of Jonathan.

JONATHAN: Are we going to talk about sex?

T, A, and S: No!

JONATHAN: Oh, I just wondered if Mom and Tony finally had it. (It's hard to say which of the other three looks most embarrassed.) I'm sorry. It's just, do you remember our family talk last Valentine's Day?

ANGELA: Uh, yes, Sweetheart, what about it?  
>JONATHAN: Well, Sam said the difference between married people and you and Tony is you two don't have S-E-X.<p>

SAM: (muttering) Me and my big mouth.

JONATHAN: And there are lots of funny things going on today. So if it's not sex making all these people act weird, what is it? (Angela takes a deep breath.)

ANGELA: Jonathan, you know that for a long time, Tony and I have loved each other as friends.

JONATHAN: Yes, you explained that last year.

ANGELA: Yes, well, that was last year.

JONATHAN: You don't love each other anymore? (to Tony) Are you going to go away?

TONY: Never. I promised. I still love you, you know. And I always will.

JONATHAN: I love you, too, Tony. (Sam rolls her eyes again.) Mom, is it OK that I love Tony more than I love Dad?

ANGELA: (hesitantly) Well, yes. You never really got to spend much time with your father.

JONATHAN: Yeah, and Tony's cooler anyway.  
>TONY: Thanks, Pal. You're pretty cool yourself. (Sam sniffs in mild disgust.) Do you have something to say, Samantha?<p>

SAM: I told you, I'm not talking.

JONATHAN: Mom, why don't you and Tony love each other anymore?

ANGELA: No, Sweetheart, you misunderstood. We still love each other.

JONATHAN: As friends?

ANGELA: (not ready to confess, especially in front of the kids) He's my best friend.

TONY: And you're mine.

SAM: (unable to hold it in any longer) Yeah, you two are real friendly, aren't you?

TONY: Samantha.

SAM: Jonathan, do you want to know what they did while we were away? (Jonathan's eyes get big and round.)

JONATHAN: (in a shocked whisper) Did they kiss?

SAM: Grow up, Jonathan. They did that twenty years ago.

JONATHAN: Twenty years ago? That's a long time!

TONY: (stunned) Sam, you know about Ingrid?

SAM: Who's Ingrid? I'm talking about when you and Angela kissed at summer camp.

ANGELA: How did you know that was us? We weren't even sure at first it was us.

SAM: Come on, Angela. The first-kiss stories were too much alike. And you two did share a motel room the night after you told those stories. (coming to a sudden conclusion) Is that when this started?

JONATHAN: What? What?

TONY: I was a perfect gentleman that night!

ANGELA: He was.

SAM: Oh, come on. I know you, Dad.

TONY: What's that supposed to mean?  
>SAM: Well, ever since Mom died, it's like you're trying to prove something. Dating all those women.<p>

TONY: Is it a crime for a widower to date?  
>SAM: That's not what I mean. Were you a perfect gentlemen with all of them?<p>

JONATHAN: Mom, what makes a gentleman perfect?

ANGELA: Holding a door open for a lady.

SAM: Yeah, and Dad held open a lot of doors. But none of those women stuck around. And I was kinda glad. I didn't want him to replace Mom.

ANGELA: Sweetheart, I'm not trying to take the place of your mother. For either of you.

SAM: You don't understand. You seemed different than Dad's other women. Classy, but also realer. Sometimes his girlfriends would butter me up, to win points with Dad, but I saw through them. You were different. You seemed to really care about me.

ANGELA: Oh, Sweetie, I do.

SAM: Yeah? Then why did you act just like all those other women?

TONY: Sam, what are you sayin'?

SAM: Look, I'll admit, for awhile now, I've wanted you two to get together. And not just so I can keep living in Connecticut. And maybe I'm a romantic, but I didn't want you to get so romantic.

JONATHAN: I don't understand.

TONY: Me neither.

SAM: If you and Angela had told us that you wanted to date, that would be different.

JONATHAN: (amazed) They're dating?  
>SAM: Jonathan, five minutes ago you were wondering if they had sex.<p>

JONATHAN: Yeah, but Grandma told me that dating and sex aren't the same thing.  
>ANGELA: She told you that?<br>JONATHAN: Yes, but she said she couldn't explain the difference till I'm older.

ANGELA: Well, that's something to look forward to.

JONATHAN: So can you tell me?

ANGELA: (uncomfortable but trying to be a modern parent) Well, sometimes people date without, without having sex.

TONY: And sometimes they have sex without dating.

SAM: And sometimes they wait more than a day to have sex. And sometimes they don't.

TONY: Is that what this is about?

SAM: Dad, I thought Angela was different for you. Then you went and treated her just like she was the same as the rest. No waiting.

TONY: Ay-oh, oh-ay! She is different and when I—held the door open for her, that was different, too.

SAM: Dad, please, I don't want details.

TONY: Don't worry. I'm not giving any.

JONATHAN: I'm really confused.

ANGELA: So am I. Sam, you seem to be angry with your father, but I'm the one you yelled at in the kitchen.

SAM: Well, I yelled at Dad in the living room.

TONY: Boy, did she ever! The temper on this kid.

ANGELA: I don't know where she gets it.

SAM: I was mad at both of you. For sneaking around. For not telling me that things had changed. For letting me find out from Marci.

TONY: Believe me, Sam, that is not how I wanted you to find out.

ANGELA: Samantha, your father and I admittedly didn't think things through. We made some mistakes, but we, or at least I, want to make this work.

TONY: You do?

ANGELA: Very much.  
>TONY: Me, too. (Their eyes meet.)<p>

SAM: (shaking herself in revulsion) Oh, they're doing the eye thing!

TONY: The eye thing?  
>JONATHAN: Yeah, sometimes you and Mom look at each other like, like you want to kiss! (He looks a little grossed out.)<p>

ANGELA: I hadn't realized we did that in front of you.

SAM: Well, not very often, thank God. I mean, don't get me wrong. If it was in a movie or something, it'd be really romantic. But it's gross when it's your parents.

JONATHAN: Yeah, even grosser than kissing because it lasts longer.

TONY: I'll try not to make eye contact with Angela in your presence anymore.

S & J: Thank you!

ANGELA: Perhaps this is a good time to talk about what we're all comfortable with.

SAM: I'm not comfortable with this conversation.

ANGELA: Nonetheless, we need to discuss it at least once. So, you don't want me and Tony to kiss in front of you?

SAM: A little peck's OK but no tonsil hockey.

JONATHAN: Yeah, no tongues either. (Sam looks at him and shakes her head.)

SAM: And hand-holding's OK. It's cute and harmless.

TONY: Oh, thank you, Sam. You're so generous to allow us that. What about hugging? (Sam looks at Jonathan and he nods.)

SAM: We're OK with that. We're used to it. Just don't make it lingering.

JONATHAN: And no grabbing each other's butts! (Tony looks amused but Angela looks sorry she brought up the subject.)

TONY: Anything else?  
>SAM: Well…. (The phone rings. She leaps to her feet.) I'll get it!<p>

TONY: Have you forgotten you're grounded?

SAM: Oh, I thought you'd lifted that.

TONY: I let you out of your room. I didn't restore your phone privileges.

SAM: (sinking back to the couch) Then what's the point?

JONATHAN: Mom, do I have phone privileges?  
>ANGELA: Of course, Sweetheart. But we're not answering the phone right now.<p>

JONATHAN: But you've been answering the door and letting all those people in.

TONY: That's why we're not answering the phone.

SAM: (like a frustrated addict) Oh, it's going to the machine!

TONY: (on answering machine) Hey, this is Tony Micelli at the Bower residence. Please leave a message for me, Angela, Sam, or Jonathan after the beep. (singing) Beep beep'm beep beep yeah!

REAL TONY: (embarrassed) Oh, I meant to erase that. I was just foolin' around.

ANSWERING MACHINE TONY: (still singing) Baby, you can drive my car! Yes, I'm gonna be a star! Baby, you can drive my car! And maybe I love you. (Angela looks amused, Sam looks as embarrassed as her father, and Jonathan bounces his head to the music.)

SAM: Oh, I really hope that's not one of my friends calling. (The machine beeps.)

MRS ROSSINI: (offscreen) Tony, you know I hate these machines. Pick up the phone!

ANGELA: Word certainly travels fast, doesn't it?  
>TONY: All the way to Brooklyn apparently. (Commercial break.)<p>

Scene XII: The living room, a minute later

(The kids are still sitting on the couch, Angela in her chair, but Tony is standing up, talking on the phone. Everyone looks much more relaxed.)

TONY: Yeah, that sounds great, Mrs. Rossini. We'll see you tomorrow night. You, too. Bye! (He hangs up.)

JONATHAN: Mom, what happens at a President's Day dinner?

ANGELA: I don't know, Sweetheart. I've never been to one either.

SAM: Oh, you'll love it! It's great! We didn't go last year but she always has these presidential dishes, like lasagna a couple years ago.

JONATHAN: Lasagna?  
>SAM: You know, for Garfield.<p>

JONATHAN: We had a cat for president?  
>SAM: What kind of History are they teaching you kids in school these days?<br>JONATHAN: I don't know. I like Science better.

ANGELA: Lasagna sounds yummy.

SAM: Well, she tries to make something different every year.

TONY: Except for three years in a row after Carter got elected. She put peanut butter on everything.

SAM: I was a little kid, I loved it!

TONY: Well, her food's always good.

SAM: Yeah, and even the desserts are presidential, like jelly beans in the shape of Reagan's hair.

TONY: And the I Cannot Tell a Lie cherry pie.

SAM: One year, she got a little lazy and served Dolly Madison cakes, but they were still good. Especially with peanut butter.

JONATHAN: I'm hungry!

TONY: Didn't Steven's mother feed you breakfast when you slept over?

JONATHAN: That was hours ago.

SAM: Yeah, Dad, it's almost lunchtime.

TONY: OK, I'm gonna make a nice Sunday brunch. Just for the four of us. If anyone knocks, we ignore them. Agreed?  
>A, S, &amp; J: Agreed. (Mona enters from the back door.)<p>

MONA: Did everyone finally leave? Such a nuisance!

TONY: Yeah, what a bunch of buttinskis.

MONA: Well, some people have no sense of boundaries.

ANGELA: How true.

TONY: Mona, you're just in time for brunch. I'm gonna make Kennedy half-dollar pancakes.

ANGELA: (amused by her own joke) Don't forget the Log Cabin syrup.

TONY: Good one, Angie.

M, S, and J: Angie?!

Scene XIII: The living room, thirty hours later

(The kids are hugging Tony and Angela goodbye in turn. Angela has her hair up and is finally wearing daytime clothes rather than a nightgown or robe. Tony's in jeans and a T-shirt. Mrs. Rossini stands in the open front doorway.)

MRS. ROSSINI: Tony, I'm so sorry you and Angela can't make it, but I understand. Business before pleasure.

TONY: Excuse me?

MRS. R: It's too bad about that banquet, but these things happen.

ANGELA: What banquet?

SAM: Jonathan, race you to the car? (He glances at the adults.)

JONATHAN: Good idea. (They dash past Mrs. Rossini and out the door.)

MRS. R: The banquet that Jonathan said you forgot about when I invited you. The one where they give the big advertising awards.

ANGELA: That's not till next month.

TONY: Gee, I wonder how he made that mistake.

ANGELA: Wait a minute. Sam said that you unfortunately had to un-invite us because your cousins dropped in unexpectedly and you didn't want to seat thirteen at the table.

MRS. R: My cousins?

ANGELA: From Venice.

MRS. R: California or Italy?

ANGELA: She didn't say.

MRS. R: I don't think I have any cousins from either. And they definitely didn't drop in on me.

ANGELA: Then why did she say that?  
>TONY: Angela. I think the kids were trying to, you know.<p>

ANGELA: Oh!

MRS. R: Is something going on?

ANGELA: (embarrassed) Well.

MRS. R: Oh, I get it! They were trying to match-make you two. And who can blame them?

TONY: Mrs. Rossini, the thing with me and Angela is—

MRS. R: How about I bring the kids back in the morning? I can even drop them off at school.

ANGELA: You don't have to—

MRS. R: Please, it's no trouble. And it's not just President's Day weekend you know. It's also Valentine's weekend.

TONY: I hadn't thought of that.

MRS. R: Maybe you better start thinkin'.

TONY: Yeah, maybe I should. (She gives them each a quick hug.)

MRS. R: (as she exits) Happy Holidays!

ANGELA: You, too. (She closes the door and leans against it, smiling at Tony.)

TONY: Well, how should we celebrate this holiday?  
>ANGELA: How about like this? (She lets down her hair and starts singing breathily.) Happy birthday to you!<p>

TONY: It's not my birthday, Angela. It's not even Washington's or Lincoln's.

ANGELA: (still singing) Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday, Mr. President of the Fairfield PTA. Happy birthday to you!

TONY: (grinning) It's good to be the president.

ANGELA: (her voice low and seductive) Maybe we can put you in the Oval Office.

TONY: Angela, you're doing it again.

ANGELA: Do you want me to stop?

TONY: Never, Angie. Never. (The Look. Freeze frame.)

(The end credits roll.)


End file.
